Nerd Out — Influence

What I Thought I Knew But Didn't Know At All: Anger as a Tool

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What I Thought I Knew But Didn't Know At All: Anger as a Tool

In high school and into my early twenties, I believed that publicly sharing your anger about injustices was the most direct way to enact change. Getting furiously angry about racism, sexism, homophobia and other injustices felt like the best way to make the world better. What I know now: In the 20 years since, I've been tasked (and sometimes just stubbornly tasked myself), with implementing changes at companies that improved equity and inclusion for employees.  What I learned from my failures and successes in those two decades: using anger as your main tool mostly back-fires. It makes others feel unsafe to collaborate with you, it creates more drama...

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ASSERTIVENESS, REJECTION AND YOUR BRAIN

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ASSERTIVENESS, REJECTION AND YOUR BRAIN

First, a definition:  Assertiveness is a series of communication techniques to ensure an interaction is fair and respectful. Put another way: assertiveness is the expectation that your core needs and boundaries are important and worth respecting, but it also means you know that others aren’t mind readers, so you have to tell them what your boundaries and needs are. Example: Imagine you’re in a loooong grocery store line and the man waiting behind you has been standing weirdly, creepily close to you the whooole time you’ve been waiting.   Option A: ignore it and pray to the gods they open...

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